Do you remember dim lights, scented candles, and romantic music playing low? What about quick passion before work…and after dinner… and sometimes instead of lunch? Do you remember long, very late, very satisfying nights? What happened? Why is all that loving just rolling around in your memory? Instead of in your bed? Sadly, it seems you and your partner lost ...

This is no small skirmish. This is war. In own your body. You’re battling an eating disorder. You will need your strength for the attack on every unhealthy thought. You will need a concrete battle plan that can restore peace, establish order, and make the war inside a thing of the past. Eating Disorder treatment is that plan. I know that, ...

Stress is the (frequently) hidden secret behind our most dangerous physical diseases. Heart disease, obesity and diabetes, cancer, asthma, gastrointestinal disease, Alzheimer’s, premature aging, and depression all have anxiety’s fingerprints all over them. For millennia we have been hardwired for anxiety. The sudden burst of energy, oxygen, and alertness is a lifesaver when you’re ...

If you are wrestling with an eating disorder, you grapple daily with food and body image. But deep down you know something more is going on inside you. Something more than hunger is happening. Something deeper than deprivation or overindulgence needs your attention. It may seem easier to pin your pain on calories, diets, carbs, or sweets. But ...

I don’t want to make you feel unimportant, in addition to your anxiety, but you are suffering from the most common mental illness in this country. Forty million other Americans, 18 percent of the population, wake up each morning to face some of the same symptoms that are making your life difficult – ...

Well, that sounds appealing, doesn’t it? Unlock the pain, but the truth is that the pain is there and is spreading a poison you don’t deserve all through your life. If you are ready to move on from the terrible thing that happened to you, you will have to confront the pain you’ve ...

Completing the emotional work that signals you are equipped to move on Once upon a time you were married. Thus avoiding all the tension and uncertainty of the dating scene. Then you divorced. And now? Now, the dating game is calling. And you’re the next contestant. You think. How do you know if you’re really ready? Dating after divorce can be tricky ...

Take a look around. It’s happening everywhere, all the time. Couples barely speak or look at each other. They rarely hold hands, engage in lingering looks, or share a long laugh. Glowing screens and the persistent need to post and tweet are draining the electricity from a legion of marriages. And, often, couples are too distracted to ...

Coming out of the closet isn’t easy. The idea of shining light on something you once felt you could never reveal is all at once terrifying and liberating. The process of throwing open the closet doors often feels strange and emotionally dangerous for those who chose to do so. As with any developmental process, coming out ...

Anxiety is meant to inhabit the body in small doses. The surges of tension, alarm, and agitation serve you well when “fight or flight” is your best defense. The adrenaline and cortisol that flow through you are meant to ebb away with the danger. Leaving you calm, your pulse steadied, your upset appeased. But what is ...

Four questions to ask yourself about vulnerability, awareness, need, and the past. Are there times, when the turmoil of your anger has finally blown over, that you sit down, frightened by your harsh response or embarrassed by a dramatic display, wondering if the recipient of your anger was really the person who inspired your ...

The best diet in the world won’t help you lose weight if you undermine your own weight loss efforts. It’s easy enough to do. Here are a few ways people unwittingly sabotage their sincere efforts to lose weight. 1. Emotional eating When stressful events are included in your day, or maybe in response to more ...

When your youngest child grows up and leaves home, you might be left grappling with some mixed emotions, uncomfortable moods, and feelings of loneliness or grief. There’s a name for that: empty nest syndrome. It’s not just you. First, understand that this is a well-established, widely known pattern of emotional and mental distress. It’s ...

From the first moment you hold your newborn child in your arms you are helping that little being build (or destroy) her sense of self-esteem. It’s a lifelong process, of course, but the strong foundation of how an adult feels about himself is laid in childhood. By the time your child is an ...

So I say, “You’re wonderful!” And you say, “What an idiot you are.” And I say, “Yes, you are. You’re wonderful.” And you say, “Man, have I got you fooled. There’s nothing wonderful here.” And I say, “I mean it; absolutely wonderful.” And you say … , well, we could go on like this for an infinity, with ...

It starts with a polite and benign statement: “I’m fine, really.” “It doesn’t matter.” “No problem.” “I’ll take care of it.” And then difficulty sets in. For some reason your friend or loved one or coworker can’t follow through on a promise, can’t finish a project, regrettably must miss the deadline. It’s not his ...

As much as we’d like to protect the people we love from any sort of pain and loss, it’s a part of every life. A fulfilling job ends, a child leaves for college, an accident or illness robs them of some ability. And, of course, death brings the ultimate in grief. People grieving any ...

How to distinguish between growing pains and a growing emotional problem   You knew the teenage years might be tough. You realized there would be moods. You figured your teens might pull away or struggle to find their own path. But something is wrong. She’s not talking to you. At all. Why is he so angry? Again. This sadness is ...

You know what you want: Little arms held up to you; eyes filled with curiosity and excitement and love; hair so fine it clings to your lips; giggles and shrieks and, yes, wails of unhappiness; silly songs, books filled with poetry; parties with too many balloons and cake that hurts your teeth. You ...

Affirmations, aren’t they those new age-y, feel-good things that the silly Saturday Night Live character Stuart Smalley repeated to himself while staring in the mirror? “I’m good enough, I’m smart enough, and doggone it, people like me.” Well, yes, and no. Affirmations are frequently the stuff of comedy routines, but they are also a ...

You’ve decided to let the marriage go. You want to be civil and gracious. You really want to divorce well and move forward peacefully. In your head, you know that conflict, confrontation, hostility, and harm are of no benefit to anyone when you are already facing one of the most difficult decisions of your life. But your ...

Roommates are nice enough. Maybe they check in with each other during the course of the day. Perhaps they chat for a bit before going out or turning in. No one is offended if it doesn’t happen. Roommates don’t miss each other if days go by and they don’t connect. But roommates and romantic partners are two very ...

It’s so easy to communicate – a glance, a sigh, an eye roll, a word or two, a tear. Message received: This is your fault. Your thoughtlessness hurt me. Why did you lie, ignore me, say no, go away, let me down, say something unkind? We’ve all been there, feeling the burn of shame ...

‘nothing sadder than when you know your relationship is in trouble – your partner may even agree – but you are the only one willing to seek help. ‘nothing more ridiculous than half of a couple going to couples therapy. ‘nothing more embarrassing than finding a therapist and having to explain that you ...

For some people, getting a divorce is just one more step in their life’s journey – it’s done, they move on. End of story. For others, adjusting to life after divorce can be challenging. They are so accustomed to being half of a couple that being alone is foreign and scary. The more ...

Loneliness is a serious problem, especially among the elderly. When you’ve outlived your closest loved ones, you miss the emotional support, friendship, and companionship that you once enjoyed on a daily basis. You’ve endured a lot in your life. If loneliness is robbing you of your happiness today, it’s just one more thing you ...

Has the relationship between you and your partner become routine and stale? Do you seem to be merely co-existing? You need to do something about it! Although each relationship is unique, some common signs emerge when things go stale: feelings of separation or loneliness, an unfulfilling connection, a lack of communication, unproductive routines, and ...

Are you one of those rare, weird people who are having trouble maintaining interest in sex? Look around you – every sixth man and every third woman is going through the same thing. With so much of their self-image tied up with sexual performance, men are more bothered by the situation than women. ...

You don’t have a lot of choices when you’re wrestling with a physical disability, but you do have some control over how you feel about it. It’s perfectly understandable why so many people sink into depression when they’ve lost some physical capacity, or struggle daily with pain and unwelcome life changes. Disability is the ...

Your depression is running your life. It robs you of sleep at night and clarity during the day. It keeps you dragging sadly from one day to the next with little hope that things will get better. It makes your head ache and your muscles sore. When it gets really bad, you have ...

Anger is a touchy emotion to manage. If we stifle anger, it can lead to depression and anxiety. Suppression can raise blood pressure and heart rate and suppress the immune system, leading to all sorts of physical complications. On the other hand, if you don’t have a handle on your anger, an explosive outburst ...

Are you trying to lose weight and you’ve found the perfect diet, but the weight just won’t come off? We can talk about the pros and cons of various diets and how well they might work with various body types, but each person’s body is unique in some ways. Many factors come into ...

Every fiscally healthy couple needs to set clear, well-appointed priorities. Unsure how to get that done? Millions of couples navigating the rocky terrain of combined finances would assure you that you are not alone. You’ll need help to get this right. Consider the following guide: I. Communicate Your Personal Priorities and Problem Areas. Reduce misunderstanding ...

The demands of everyday living can stretch any relationship thin at times. Balancing duties at home and work can be enough to tax a relationship — but throw in a couple of kids, routine visits to the in-laws on holidays, and increasing responsibilities at work, and you have a perfect recipe for strained ...

If you’ve been married for years, you might need a few tips to keep your marriage healthy, happy, and alive. The following ten tips are regarded as “chores” only tongue in cheek. They aren’t really “chores” per se, but a way of living that provides an environment for happiness together. Don’t try them all ...

Recovery from infidelity is a hard road. The words still hurt when you hear them: Infidelity. Cheating. Affair. For a while you really weren’t sure you could deal. You know what you did. You know what was done to you. The betrayal, the hurt that preceded it, and the pain that followed seemed like too many obstacles on ...

Three unique ways trauma affects women Just being female puts a woman at risk for developing post-traumatic stress disorder. According to the National Center for PTSD, 5 out of 10 women often relive the circumstances of their individual traumas and struggle to move forward. They attempt to manage the hyper-arousal, nervousness, and shame; quell the sense ...

How hope can be restored without drugs. Your world is still spinning, but each turn is painful and pointless and you just want off the carousel. How should you fight depression? Is medication the answer? Somehow, for you, it doesn’t seem like the right choice. You want clarity and joy throughout the revolutions of your life. You want ...

When it’s good, it’s very, very good. You’re relaxed. Sounds and sights are more vivid. Everything is a bit funny. Time loses its tyranny. Man, this feeling is great! Well, okay, there’s the clumsiness, hunger and thirst, distorted senses, but at the first, the pluses outweigh the negatives. Do you roll another to keep ...

Sure, kids can be strange sometimes. They’re growing up and finding their way in a strange world of mixed messages. Kids might experiment with being someone they aren’t, too, as they become exposed to a variety of personalities in this world. It’s hard being a kid. As a parent, it’s hard to know if ...

It would easy if you both earned exactly the same, wouldn’t it? That doesn’t happen in real life, though, and almost every couple deals with an income gap. When the gap is large, you really have to be on your game to keep it from becoming a big and continuing problem. It’s important ...

Infidelity definitely does not need to end your relationship. Unless either or both of you doesn’t want to put out the energy and endure the pain of fighting through to the other side. It’s not easy to overcome the lost trust and disappointment produced by infidelity, but it can be done and your ...

Are Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram making you sad? Take a moment to peruse the posts, tweets, and selfies of your social media friends. Judging by appearances, depression may not be the word that necessarily springs to mind. After all, depression is a serious mood disorder, marked by persistent sadness, and worthlessness. Look again at those ...

Are you anxious right now? Are you anxious all the time? Does anxiety keep you on edge or overwhelm you without warning? How did you sleep last night? Were you able to quiet the worrisome thoughts? Anxiety, when it performs correctly, is the life preserving mechanism that maintains your safety, infusing you with the adrenaline you ...

Take steps toward loving and accepting yourself as you are How much are you worth? Who do you see when you walk toward a mirror? Do you admire that person and want a closer look? Or do you look away? Self-esteem is a powerful reflection of how you feel about who you are, what you mean, and whether ...

What a fun journey it is that leads us to marriage – the spark of interest at that first meeting; the marvel of discovering someone who shares your beliefs, interests, and sense of humor; the joy of reconnecting after you’ve been apart (no matter how long); the breathtaking leap into planning a future ...

Someone you care about is depressed. Of course you wish your loved one would feel better, and you ache to help. Sometimes it’s hard to know what to do for a person battling depression. Here’s a tip: be careful what you say. Sometimes a well-intended statement of support can have a reverse effect. What ...

7 ways to find relief and balance. Stress is a natural biological response and a powerful motivator. Most of us accept it as the necessary adrenaline push to get things done. It focuses our energies and helps us rise to various demands. In fact, our fast-paced lives seem to necessitate a stressful pace. But stress can be a ...

Early in a romantic relationship, it takes little effort to find fulfillment in the budding romance. It’s new and exciting. Learning about each other offers its own source of fulfillment. Overlooking each others character flaws, personality quirks, and differing viewpoints is easy to do. This early relationship energy easily holds a relationship together during ...

There’s no question that psychotherapy changes lives. Surveys with those who are undergoing therapy show that half reported improvement in their lives after just six sessions and 75 percent improved after 12 sessions. There’s no magic to where that change comes from: it’s a combination of your therapist’s skill, knowledge, and experience and ...